Please note, this is an automated transcript so it is not 100% accurate.

Kim (00:00:11):
All right. So let me, we’re just gonna get straight into, I’ll do an intro afterwards and explain how I did the program as well, um, live in flow and how many years have you guys been doing this? Just out of interest, before we start,

Guy (00:00:32):
We run our first retreat January, 2019.

Kim (00:00:38):
God, just as Covid <laugh>, yeah.

Matt (00:00:40):
Yeah. We tied the perfect, didn’t we?

Guy (00:00:42):
Yeah, we did

Kim (00:00:43):
<laugh>. All right. All right. Here we go. So, without doubt, what an absolute honor and privilege to have two gorgeous souls on the Self-Love podcast. Welcome, beautiful guy. And Matt,

Guy (00:01:05):
Thank you.

Matt (00:01:06):
Thank you.

Kim (00:01:07):
Do you know, it’s been a long time coming. I have absolutely loved all the work that you two do, but before we go into all of that, perhaps you could just both because Matt, this is the first time you’ve been on the show. Could you just give us a little background as to who you are, both of you, what your work is, and then how we came into doing the work that you’re doing today?

Matt (00:01:28):
Good question. <laugh>, for, for, for me, it’s, it is been a windy, windy road, um, being a, a, a defiant child back in the, the States, um, finding my way, a very sensitive kid. And, um, over the years, I think I, I discovered that there was, there was more to me than just the physical stuff and being a, um, a sensitive boy in the Midwest. Um, and through life’s challenges and things, I found my way to, um, to embrace those sensitivities, to really start to understand that I was able to work with energy, work with, um, sound and vibration in a way that helped open up not only my heart, but the heart of others. And, um, that then led to me developing the work that I do now, which is, um, working mostly with breath and sound and helping people to discover the larger part of who they are and really open into their, their heart’s desires. So that in a nutshell is kind of where I’ve come from, who I am and why I do the work.

Kim (00:02:32):
It’s quite compelling as you hear those words. And with respect coming from a beautiful gentleman like yourselves, the peer of you, it doesn’t seem to be a common thing. So before we start talking about heart work, guy, just reiterate for us how this work brought you into opening your heart into more realms of possibility into all the things that you teach.

Guy (00:02:58):
Boy, yeah, it does. I agree. It does feel foreign for a man to be saying vulnerability, expressing emotions. And I do often wonder, Kim, how vulnerable I actually am and how well my emotions are expressed, you know, cause they’re still that, uh, well spoken in me as well at the same time. But I think the, just to summarize it up, before getting into the hard work, I, I actually always thought it was all metaphorical. So when I read a spiritual, once I started leaning into this work and started reading, or I guess the, the books Wayne Dyer always came into, you know, 20 years ago, it was always, um, near me, Deepak Chopra. And they were, and, uh, I remember reading The Alchemist, um, many years ago as well, which was just mind blowing. But all these things were left me pondering, but there was a definite gap between the intellect and actually the embodiment of the work and actually trying to figure out what the hell they were on about half the time.

Guy (00:03:58):
Anyway, especially Deepak Tora, I dunno if you listened to him. <laugh>. So, so it, it, there was this gap that I’d never, so I always thought in, it was metaphorical actually being back into an operating from the heart. And it wasn’t until I had a physical sensation of physical embodiment and transformation that went beyond what any book could say, what any meditation could, would teach you anything but an actual experience. And when that happened, it’s like you blown the barn doors are blown wide open, and you can’t go back to the old way. Cuz all of a sudden that gap between the intellect and the, the metaphorical things that I thought were just metaphors. There was a, there was an actual tangible experience and, and it’s almost like a thread is then formed from the intellect into the experience. And then you get to slowly over time add other threads and it becomes a rope and it becomes really strong and all of a sudden you have this much more powerful connection between the intellect, the mind, but something far deeper within ourselves that was there all along.

Guy (00:05:19):
But we just never really been taught how to allow it to reveal itself to then be part of the wisdom of the entirety of what it means to be human. So there’s, for me, that was always disconnected. It was there, but it was disconnected. And going beyond that, I used to get hung up on the tools and the meditations and everything and, and reading more books. But then once the, once I was kind of let go of all that and had the experience, then I started to go, ha, cuz we get caught up on the, the meditation, we get caught that nonsense, not for me, this is not, and we get caught up in all the things beyond that. That’s then not allowing us to actually connect to that deeper aspect of ourselves. And as a man, once I understood that there was so much true power within that, to really step into the fullness of myself, to not only, um, so my actions aligned with my truths, and from there I could start to live, I, I guess a greater expression of myself. And I always lean into that and ask, is there more which allows me to continue to, to grow and move forward? Which then, as Tony Robbins once said, um, you know, if you’re not growing, you’re dying. And I, and I, and I truly feel and believe that now, so I get to nurture that daily, act upon it daily and, and treat life with more of an adventure coming from that place.

Kim (00:06:52):
I really appreciate the way you both speak. And I just wanna ask both of you, is this how you’ve always spoken? Has it always been there? That open, vulnerable, sensitive aspect of what it means to reveal oneself, to really talk openly and truly about one’s feelings? Or as a man, is this something you’ve learned

Matt (00:07:15):
With that hand gesture to me? Mate, mute.

Guy (00:07:22):
I’m mute.

Matt (00:07:23):
Yeah, yeah, you’ve muted yourself. Shut down. Just, just pass it over. Pass the baton, huh? Oh, fantastic. Now as you asked that question, this the interesting thing, um, because I think, um, internally, it’s, it’s always there and it’s like, and I think all men have that capacity, and it’s like, it seems like a foreign thing because externally what we’re conditioned into is, is completely different than what’s going on internally. I feel, and we see this in the retreats all the time, is that, you know, these men will come in mostly dragged there by their partners, um, and then they have deeper, more profound experiences sometimes than their partners because they’re so open to it on some level, but they just haven’t explored it. And, um, and so the, you know, the women in the room are, are just blown away that how deeply they can feel and how open and vulnerable they can be.

Matt (00:08:14):
And it’s like, to me, being a man that’s always been there for me, but I’ve had to suppress it and really push it down. I, I alluded to that I grew up in Midwest, um, middle America, and, um, you know, to be a sensitive boy there, it was not okay, uh, especially back in the, uh, eighties, seventies, late seventies, eighties, nineties, around there, it’s like not okay. It, it wasn’t accepted. And, um, and for me, I had to actually get through all that and then find my way to la where I was accepted as a, as a sensitive man and, and creative and artist and, and all this stuff. And, um, that’s what helped me nurture that ability to actually express was through, um, drama and acting and music and expression and all this, it was a whole 10 year journey for me in Los Angeles to really start to open into how to then release the suppressed feelings and how to articulate my emotional landscape that’s wanting to reveal itself through my heart.

Matt (00:09:15):
And, um, and as I started to do that, then the, the discomfort, the misalignment, the um, inner conflict that was always brewing within me started to dissipate. And so, you know, for a long time I was very analytical. I, I have a computer engineering background and you know, that was rewarded in middle America as I grew up as a, as a boy. And, um, and so I lent into that a lot. But then when I started to surrender that and start to embrace the heart and let the heart speak to the mindness, to the head suppressed the heart, that’s when my life really started to get some momentum and I really started to feel comfortable in my own skin. And, um, and as that started to build and I built upon that, then the work that I do now started to reveal itself and how to actually then present to myself in the world and who I actually came in to be. My true purpose was then birth. So, um, I hope that answers the question <laugh>.

Kim (00:10:21):
Sorry, I was just handing it over to you with a gesture to you guy as to your thoughts and feelings about what it means to be a man to fully, truly express yourself. And perhaps you could take it even a step further how you’ve handled, if there’s been any objection to that or has it been beautifully welcomed into your sphere and people that are around you?

Guy (00:10:46):
Yeah, um, well I have first, like everything Matt said with I’m just like, nod in my head, ha ha ha ha especially the suppress part. You know, it’s like, it is always there, but we, we just never, I guess, have the opportunity to, or, or even for me, was shown away to that. So it wasn’t until the pain got great enough within me with that suppressed aspect of myself to then start to become more vulnerable and started putting myself out there. And, and, and even for me, vulnerability at the time was, um, starting to really realize how much of my ego myself was embedded in an identity around who I thought I was and how I attach myself, you know, especially at a younger age to being a rugby player and proven my worth through that physicality, that aspect of the man. Like, I still love to throw weights around and grunt at the gym and beat my chest.

Guy (00:11:46):
You know, that’s, that’s something I still love to nurture. But on the opposite end, it’s then allowing and feeding that, that, that softer aspect, that heart aspect, and allow that to be able to communicate and voice itself and start to navigate through life as well. And to answer your question about how did people respond, I think the, the, the biggest challenge for me was when leaving my company 180 Nutrition to step into more of this, this role in this work and be able to pass on and teach this work to other people and say, look, this is the way I’ve done it and this is how it’s helped me and I want to help you too. And for me, that was a real, uh, interesting lesson because I, I realized how much of my self, even though I told myself every day that I wasn’t inclined in my identity of the success of the brand that it created was moving, that I was petrified.

Guy (00:12:43):
I was actually terrified of what people were gonna think. And I remember with my podcast, not actually not putting it into the spirituality category cuz even spirituality felt like a foreign concept beyond, um, the experiences I was having to have a conversation. But I think that was just the Welsh beliefs in me. Not all Welsh people are like that, but just the way I was at that time. So I realized though, as I spoke about it, more people that wanted to listen just started to gravitate to it and were genuinely curious and could see through my actions of how I was living, um, I was, I was, I was I guess living my truth and I was acting upon it and navigating for good or bad, better for worse. But I was out there, I guess in the frontline trying to live my life to the, to the truest part of myself.

Guy (00:13:40):
So I realized quickly people were cheering me on and it was nothing like what I told myself in, in my head the whole time. And people really started to rally behind me and, and wanted to know more, which was so refreshing and was a major lesson to me and said, well, why don’t I just, why do I have to worry about what other people are thinking or accepting? And it’s up to them, and we can intellectually think that, but quite often our actions don’t meet that. And we, there are, there are shadow aspects of ourselves that shrink just to fit in that I’m sure you’re aware. But then, um, I I, I quickly realized the more I am myself, the more people just wanted to be or listen to that or, and learn from that as well because it was inspiring them in some way.

Guy (00:14:29):
And then the other people that I still have no idea if they existed or not, nobody’s come up to me in my face and said, oh, that’s, you know, I can’t believe you’re out there teaching this nonsense. This is all crap. If they’re thinking that and saying that, then good on them, but I’m not really hearing that. And those things never really, um, affect me these days at all. So that was a really valuable lesson. And I just find when we run workshops, like we, we are finally out there doing them again and we have a who like, you know, we just be ourselves and we’ll share from the heart. And I think sometimes people find that surprising, but it gives other people permission to come back to that place too. And, and we, again, we see it all the time at the retreats, especially as we go deeper. It’s like it gives ourselves permission to let all this baggage go and we realize it’s not as hard as we think <laugh>, you know? And, and by starting to come back to ourselves and and nurture that aspect of ourselves, life starts to bring on more meaning and we can start to heal the aspects of ourselves that we have maybe bought into emotionally that we’ve thought about ourselves for a long time. I don’t know if that answers the question,

Kim (00:15:42):
But it does, it opens up a whole lot of more questions as we know the deeper we go, there’s, there’s more to know. But one thing you’ve both mentioned in various ways is the word pain. And when we open ourselves up to and acknowledge that life is full of the dichotomies of pain and joys, I saw an acronym once that pain as pay attention integrate. Now do you think as human beings, we have to have pain to be opened up? Or is this something that every one of us has to hit rock bottom for want of a better word, to actually find ourselves into the true meaning of what it means to be a human, to experience all realms of emotion and to appreciate that it is part of the human experience. Is that something that you would both agree with? Or is there another variance for you as to why pain is in our lives? Perhaps you could both give us your feedback on that.

Matt (00:16:40):
Well, guy, I think that’s a question for you, mate. So <laugh>

Guy (00:16:46):
Just conscious of doing all the talking on that one. Um, no, I, first of all, I believe that, um, we don’t have to be in pain to change personally. I think, um, I I I really feel we can be proactive and and nurture that aspect of ourselves. That that is yearning for growth, that is yearning for truth, that is yearning for connection. There is yearning for peace, there is yearning for joy, there is yearning for love. There’s, there’s, there’s always deeper aspects of those elements. And, but sadly, I think we are living in a society that is so conditioned and addicted to stress that we are oblivious. We don’t actually give ourselves the time or space anymore to nurture that aspect of ourselves, hence the disconnection. And we, you know, we speak about this at our workshops, but you know, a stat is that our nervous system receives more information in one day than it does in a lifetime, 150 years ago.

Guy (00:17:53):
So when you think about that for a moment, we, none of us are immune to it. None of us are escaping from it. If we are living with technology and living in the, the crazy pace and the expectations of what it means to be a parent, to be working, to be paying a mortgage and, and it all the other demands that it comes with, you know, throw in social media, Netflix, tv, distractions, then all of a sudden we are then completely starting to detach ourselves from that. And if we do that long enough, we forget that other aspect is ever there. And as we forget that that other aspect of ourselves is there, then the pain will start to grow more and more. Not not in all cases, but that this is, this was my experience. And then, you know, what starts to show up in our lives is, is I guess a misalignment, uh, incoherence of the human body, of the human experience.

Guy (00:18:49):
And that might have taken years to manifest because we’ve been so detached and unaware of a certain aspect. And it can turn up physically, it can turn up emotionally, it can turn up mentally, it can turn up in our relationships, it can turn up in our jobs. They’re all aspects of ourselves and we are so good at pointing the fingers outwards consistently. And we never really stopped to consider and turn ourselves inward and look at how are we perceiving this moment by moment. I, I had the fortune of interviewing Neil Donald Walsh just a few days ago, you know, real conversations at God. And one question he left me with right at the end was, cuz I ask everyone on the show, um, is there anything you wanna leave listeners to ponder on? And he said, what if everyone listening would take a moment when something is happening, you know, that’s a struggle. Or that if you ask the question, what is my soul’s agenda right now? Allowing us to then go beyond the self, beyond the mind and start to think at a deeper level and start to maybe reflect upon the things that are happening that are happening for us and not to us. And there’s a much great, a vantage point to be had if we are willing to start to go inward and reflect as opposed to pointing fingers out all the time. So I guess you might, you’re gonna jump in. Go for it. <laugh>,

Matt (00:20:28):
You covered some ground there mate. I know. I dunno if there’s more room to move after that one. Geez. Uh, <laugh>, the, the way that I look like, I think the, the, I’m trying to keep the thread of where, where the question was, it was around the pain and do we need to, um, actually experience pain? Is that, is that right Kim? Yeah. Um, and, and I always distill it down cause I ask myself this quite often. I just, um, why, why do we have to suffer so much? Why do we have to go through all these challenges and, and is it necessary? Um, and I I like to distill things down to its most simple level and the way that, you know, we can look at this work in many different ways. And when we start to work in the energy bodies, the spirit, the soul, this kind of realm, the heart, you know, all this stuff, it can get quite complex.

Matt (00:21:20):
And um, and to me it can be distilled down to one thing is that in the, in the essence of all that I am and, and, and all of my searching and, and all the work that I’ve done, what I’ve found is there’s a, there’s a part of me, there’s a piece of me that is untouched and untainted and undisturbed by any of the experiences that I go through in my life or any life. And, um, and that to me is my essence, my soul. And it’s in, in what I would call flow. There’s, there’s no, no duality there. There’s no resistance, there’s no pain, there’s no struggle. It just is everything in flowing and, and ever expanding space. And so if that then exists and, and I, and I have touched that in many different ways within myself, then anything in resistance to that would create a restriction or a, a pain, if you will.

Matt (00:22:20):
And so to me it’s either we’re allowing the flow, the essence of ourselves to move through us, or we’re creating a resistance to it. And the resistance to it comes from an attachment of something that is not our true essence. And so, like I was saying, there’s all, you know, all this information that we’re being bombarded with and all these different outlets of distractions that we then have an opportunity to attach ourselves to and identify with. And then that creates a false identity to the truth of what’s wanting to reveal itself through us. And that’s where the pain comes in. And so we can look at all those opportunity, all those pain points and attachments as opportunities for us to release attachment so that we can open into the vastness of who we are. And that’s the way that I would would say that you don’t have to have the pain because you could just completely rip yourself, open yourself to the flow of life and the essence of everything that’s wanting to reveal itself and just be in bliss.

Matt (00:23:23):
That to me is enlightenment. Or you can, as we do, it’s just human nature that there’s a fear there. There’s a fear to our light, to our vastness, to that expanse. And, and so we clinging to, it’s a funny thing isn’t that we clinging to life that’s actually wanting to move through us. And if you look at your breath, you know, we don’t hold our breath cuz then you die. We don’t hold the, the heart doesn’t stop beating cuz then we die. But yet we, we clinging to life <laugh> to see if it as if we don’t have enough of it. But it’s funny to just flow through us. So it’s either resistance or allowing is what it comes down to. And when I feel pain, when I go through pain and I get my wits about me, you know, obviously there’s some pretty heavy times that I’m like, ah, but you know, when I get my wits I’m like, okay, where am I holding myself back from myself, my essence, and then let go, let go and trust

Kim (00:24:20):
The most beautiful thing about you both. And the work that you are now offering is teaching us how to be in that flow state. Could you both describe to us what exactly you mean when you say being in flow?

Guy (00:24:39):
It, for me, it’s very simple. Um, it’s being in connection to the divine, that larger aspect of yourself that much just broke down so well in that. And when I’m, when I’m out of my own way and I know I’m I’m within my heart, I’m, I’m not thinking about anything. It’s almost like if I could give myself a labor, you know, remove a part of my brain and just, and that pack offline and then I could just be in this, in this moment, it literally is being fully present. You’re not in the future, you’re not in the past. The challenges are is that our body will risk, will hold information that technically is beyond space and time that has happened, maybe an event 20 years ago, but is still being held in this present moment. And that is then keeping the body in a certain identification of what it is known to feel safe.

Guy (00:25:47):
So we start to live more guarded. We start to be fearful and anticipating and, and have an anxiety basis towards the future or the different events that come in that are keeping us all out of the present moment that are keeping us all out of the flow. So we spend most of that time future based anticipation, oh my god, what’s gonna happen? Or past based pondering of why me, what happened there? What is going on? Like, and we can hold anger and resentment and guilt and all these different emotions that have they their, their place, but not if they’re reoccurring constantly. So for me to answer your question, living in flow is getting beyond that and being in connection, being in part of that aspect of ourselves that is beyond all that that is there. And you know, that can be done through activities that can be done through meditation, that can just be done through life living.

Guy (00:26:48):
And just the more I’ve nurtured myself and my body and worked through the different layers that needed to help myself get back to this realignment with mind, body, heart, soul emotions that, that I know the body is not running so much from past experiences that have happened. The more I’ve worked on myself, the more I find myself just being, the more the things that don’t trigger me, the events that have happened, and then I just come back to see things how they are without trying to impose the human condition of myself upon it and make it mean much worse or much better than what it actually is. If that makes sense. So that’s what being in flow is and I strive for that daily. Don’t get it right or daily, but I strive for it.

Kim (00:27:44):
Matt, with your sound and the amount of healing and stuff that you’ve worked with yourself through that, is that why sound and music and the ability to allow the rhythm of sound to create a flow if you want within you, is that why you’ve been so drawn to that around flow?

Matt (00:28:08):
Ah, that’s a, that’s a good question. I think, yeah, I, I don’t know how to, I I, the sound just has always been something that I can find peace in, you know, music and melodies and uh, you know, just even sitting in nature and just, just drop into this, the subtle sounds that are surrounding us all the time just brings peace to me. And, um, I I can, I I I always, always heard like everything is, everything is vibration. Everything is sound. These are like common phrases that are, that come through when you’re a sound healer and you’re exploring the, the wisdom and the healing power of sound. It’s like, um, all the creation is vibration, you know, this kind of stuff. And um, and that really came to, uh, uh, a reality for me when I was in the jungles of Peru and, um, working with, um, some plant medicines there.

Matt (00:29:14):
And, um, the, um, the, the shaman that was leading the ceremony, he had his little rattle and, and uh, like a bundle of leaves that he just shook, you know, and it’s like, and then he would have his quedo, which is like the, the chance of the mantras, the songs that they sing to invoke the spirit of the plant and the, and the spirit of the, um, the, the nature around us. And uh, and he was going on and on and on. It was, it was a beautiful thing and it was, it was, it was really, you know, quite a lucid experience being on the medicine. And um, and then at one point it got to this place where I was like, he stopped and I thought that he put on some music and I was like, whoa, that is the most beautiful, beautiful track, um, that he’s playing there.

Matt (00:30:08):
And I thought, wait a minute, we’re in this hut in the middle of the jungle. There’s no electricity, he doesn’t have a radio and he’s not doing anything. And then I realized what I was hearing, this, this symphony of sound that was revealing itself to me that I thought was the most beautiful song that I’d ever heard in my life was actually life around me and the vibration of creation that was revealing itself to me. And it was like far out, like I get it now cuz I actually was in that space to be open enough to feel it and hear it at a much deeper level than just my ears was my ears. It was hearing, it was my heart that was hearing, it was my soul that was, was being felt. And that to me then was this profound illustration of flow. And that in essence there is this symphony of sound that is actually what we are, we are our soul song that is singing into manifestation, into creation.

Matt (00:31:12):
And this is the science now supporting this. You know, this is what the mystics and the ancients have spoken to for millennia. And that’s why you find music ma mantra sound in every culture, in every tradition that’s ever been because it’s known and it is. And now science is saying you are in vibration. Every molecule in your body, every cell, every particle from the smallest to the greatest is actually vibrating. It is creating some sort of frequency. And we have the instruments now to measure that. And that to me is when we’re in flow, is when we’re allowing ourselves to be in harmony with the vibrations of life that’s wanting to move through us.

Kim (00:31:58):
It’s almost poetic listening to you both speak. One of the things, and I’m gonna jump right in here now into your beautiful live and flow workshops, which you run with the amazing Petra, one of the things that really stuck in my mind and for the listener, they need to know that I’ve had the privilege and honor to be in this beautiful workshop of yours. One of the things that you talk a lot about all of you is about embodiment. And many of us don’t really appreciate what it means to truly fully embody the work or embody the messages or the vibrations. One of the things that stuck out to me wholeheartedly, many of us come into this work through pain or through the opening of our hearts because we’re inquiring or we are curious or we need to know more or things have to change for whatever reason.

Kim (00:32:51):
And so a lot of people come into this work through meditation and some people fight it and don’t understand the space and the, the real connection to what it means to be still and present. And you guys do things in this workshop that allow us to embody all of these different things. And without giving too much away, one thing I’d really love for you to explain if you can, is that when we become fully immersed and experience the presence of what it means to be physically present, like to be fully, fully physically present creates the opportunity to go beyond what we comprehend, I guess as zero point field, which then opens us up into full potentiality and possibility we can’t get there, in my humble opinion without now really fully understanding what it means to be present to the body, the physical. Could you both explain to us how you allow your beautiful participants to really understand what it means to embody the work that you’re teaching?

Guy (00:34:04):
That’s a big question. Who’s first? You, you’re smiling at me there.

Matt (00:34:08):
Well, <laugh> know that is, that’s a massive question, Kim. Thanks. Keep it light here. Podcast. Uh, well the first thing that comes, I’ll start I guess cuz something comes to mind for me is, um, embodiment of that and giving people the opportunity is, is that we just don’t sit still like, you know, a guy mentioned earlier is how many distractions we have going on and we don’t give ourselves that space anymore just to be present, just to just stop. Like, like this morning I just went down like I have this nice table out in front yard here that just overlooks this bay and I just, I sit and have a coffee and I just, I just stop. And in that stillness then it allows for a space of something to reveal. And I think on the retreats and, and the workshops that we do, it’s like we, we pull people out of all their distractions in their lives and we, and we give them that opportunity then to just be still.

Matt (00:35:10):
And so our body and our breath are two major components that are always ever here. They can’t be anywhere else. They have to be here. The body’s always now, the breath is always now. And so if we start to then lean into those two things and we have, you know, the meditation, we have the, the movement work, we have the sound work, we have the, you know, many techniques and processes that we facilitate that lean into that being present with your breath and your body. And that is in the essence of it all. And then from that space, it’s like then the, the doors fling open and you drop into this eternal nowness of which the mind pulls us out of. Cuz the mind has the capacity to be in time and and time is a linear construction of the mind than for us actually to perceive the vastness of all it is.

Matt (00:36:02):
We can’t, this mind doesn’t have that capacity has only the capacity to perceive in linear time. And so it pulls us out of that nowness and allows us to lean into the past and envision the future, which is a, a necessity for us to be here because then we start to then create based on where we focus our attention. But it’s also a downfall because it then can pull us out of the now moment and away from the body, which is always here in the breath that is always here. And the expansion of consciousness that is always are here. Mm-hmm. <affirmative>. So in essence what we’re doing is processes and practices to sit <laugh> and be still

Guy (00:36:45):
For some being very active processes as well.

Matt (00:36:48):
Indeed, indeed. We don’t just sit in a, in a in lotus position do we, and just own for brick and four days.

Guy (00:36:54):
And, and just to, just to build upon what you’ve explained, cause what came to me as well is when you say about the embodiment of the work and getting back to that present is, is recognized, it comes and it’s funny, I’m using this word now, but I is the divinity within us. And when you, when you start to connect to that larger aspect of yourself, for me there’s, there’s, you know, the universe is, is unconditional love, notd, but unconditional that it, it resonates and there’s, there’s, there’s a connection that forms that. It’s hard to explain, but people have experiences of this, this non-separation. Cause they say separation is the, the, the more separate we are from source, the more suffering that we can endeavor, right? Or not endeavor, but we have. And as we start to close that gap of separation back to source, we start to almost then start to experience emotions and feelings that we might not have even ever experienced in our entire life.

Guy (00:38:12):
And that actually then starts to create a new reference point for the body to know what’s possible. And once we have that reference point, we can take that back into our lives and start to change the, the compass, the direction and the choices that we make consciously and unconsciously on a daily basis that will start to support that new reference point that we have. And then we can move towards much deeper feelings of peace, joy, appreciation, and love. And they can become our default way of being as opposed to the stressed out, you know, social media junkie, food, eating bloody, I’m just numbing my emotions daily kind of person that we can fall into as well. So to me that’s where the, the true embodiment starts to come in. But interestingly as well, because there’s a word called entrainment, which which essentially means all systems of the body working in harmony like a, like a symphony.

Guy (00:39:25):
And because of that stressful life we live, we, we never really fully in symphony. And when you bring people together, there’s a phenomena that starts to happen where you start to have group entrainment over a period of time. So it’s like if you have, um, all grandfather clocks in a room ticking away, they will all end up ticking to the same, to the largest clock within the room over a period of a few days. So they’ll all be in harmony and they’ll all be in that coherence, that entrainment. And that happens at the retreat we had the, um, I’m going off on a slight tangent where I think it’s really important for listeners cuz we, we had someone come in, in our retreat recently in May where we were able to measure the nervous system of the entire group. We formed a circle and everyone connected one hand to one wrist forming a chain which went into a computer which was able to measure the nervous system.

Guy (00:40:25):
So the nervous system being the gateway to, it’s like the filter between the body and the mind and the perception of reality. So if you start to understand the nervous system, that’s when you can start to truly embody something. And so we measured the collective group nervous system and just within three days, um, the, the entrainment readings basically to simplify something were unbelievable. And there was a, there was a measurement for mind, rumination meaning mental chatter on the first day it was off the charts on the last day there was no mental rumination. So people were fully present, fully in their hearts, fully connected, fully entrained. Now imagine what that would mean to the body and that embodiment if you were able to start to carry that moving forward long term. If you continue to nurture the practices and what could happen within that body, if you’re given it permission to reorganize itself, to reheal itself, to come back to a natural coherent state, it’s amazing. And the body knows exactly what to do. I feel we just gotta get out of the way to allow it to, to help nurture itself.

Matt (00:41:41):
Oh, a hundred percent. I’m glad you said that, Mike, because it’s like, you know, I’m talking about vibrations and woo vu and all this stuff. It, it’s like, it can be misconstrued often is that there’s, you know, there’s, there’s tremendous benefit to dropping into all this. And I think often because we’re so conditioned in our lives to do things, do, do, do do, do. And I, if I’m not having the relationship with the success or the life of the, you know, whatever it is that I want, then I need to do something else. I need to do more. But we don’t actually address what’s going on internally. And that’s the beauty of this work. And I think it often gets washed out because of all the doing. And so, you know, what you’re alluding to with the nervous system and having that space for the body then to come into harmony and all that is the basis then for an environment that will then nurture the life that you want to live. So it’s like, you know, we tend to put the cart before the horse and it’s like with this, it’s like, no, put the horse there first and then pull the cart.

Kim (00:42:40):
One of the things, I don’t know if either of you’re aware of, but many years ago I was invited to participate in a 24 hour race and it was around a 400 meter track for 24 hours. And I’ll never forget one of my greatest mentors to this day coming up to me, cliff Young was his name. He won the inaugural Sydney to Melbourne race at 68 years of age, this funky little potato farmer. And he said to me, you’re about to meet the real you. And I was 21 went, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Got it. And I set off on this 24 hour journey just thinking, how am I gonna stay awake? And really the way I transcended through various emotions and perceptions of what I thought was reality, that then wasn’t reality. Because one minute my left ankle was really hurting and when I sent at love and really tried to nurture it within seconds, it was now my right knee or it was my neck or it was something else.

Kim (00:43:38):
And there’s something about pushing the body physically or doing something outside of almost shocking the nervous system as you’re talking about, to create a wall, to come down the walls of what we think is truth and reality. Now I ran the last two hours of that race quicker than I ran the first two hours of that race. What happened in between, there was a dichotomy of highs and lows, quitting conversations, perceptions what I thought was real, what wasn’t real. There was just so much. And I got it when Cliffy said, you’re gonna meet the real you cuz the real me was a tantrum throwing a person who blamed a girl for giving me pumpkin soup instead of a cup of tea. That was the reason the RA race was over to the unbelievable sense of, I’m not even here, I didn’t even know who I am anymore.

Kim (00:44:32):
I didn’t even know if this is true. Am I running around a 400? Like, I didn’t even know how to articulate it, but I want to say this, that your beautiful live and flow retreat took me back to that space of unlimited potentiality of what was even real for me. Combine that with the incredible breath sessions, the music, the sounds, the environment, and that beautiful group entrainment, I have to say to you, uh, took me to another level of my own existence and what I thought was real. And I love the fact that you guys bring this along with Petra without sounding too woohoo. And like I’ve lost my sense of, of reality in this moment. It is so beautiful for us to have these conversations. So my question to both of you is this, what is real?

Guy (00:45:34):
Oh,

Matt (00:45:38):
<laugh> silence.

Guy (00:45:45):
Who thought

Matt (00:45:46):
It looks like you’re brewing up a

Guy (00:45:48):
No, I, it’s, you know, the, the more I lean into this work and explore, like, um, I don’t, I mean, if you’re coming from, I guess the, the conception of Newtonian physics, 3D reality, subject object, space, time moving, it’s all real. I mean it’s, it’s real, it’s real. Like if I’m, if I try running through that door when it’s closed, it’s gonna hurt <laugh>, uh, a lot. So from that aspect, there’s, there’s no denying, you know, we, we are experiencing physical reality, but the, it depends on what level of mind I guess, or awareness are we asking the question from, which will then conjure up very different answers.

Guy (00:46:46):
Hence why I think I’m up to episode 230 odd now on my podcast and why I have quantum physicists on there, why I’ve had a NASA physicist on there, why I’ve had, uh, shamans on there, why I’ve had people that have literally died on the operating table for 15 minutes and had out of body experiences and have come back and been able to share every single detail of what’s just happened. So when we start to get beyond that level of thinking of just our stressed out stress, nervous system, dense, heavy bodies, dense, heavy emotions, no connection to ourselves, to the body, to the divine, to something greater, everything’s real. It’s as real as it is ever gonna be. But once you start having experiences, once you start going inward, and if it’s been pain or 30 years that have driven you to, we, we have had people that have come to our retreats that have,

Guy (00:47:55):
Have in a moment would answer that question from, from the day they came in to the day they left. And they might have been in a whole world of pain to go, holy shit, what is real anymore? Are we actually, this is the question I ask myself. Like, is the brain a receiver of consciousness or is it generating consciousness and consciousness being awareness and we become aware of life and you know, there’s a very mechanical aspect or a very, um, a cooperative universal aspect. And to me, I was, I never even used to think either, all but through my experiences will we have know for sure until, I don’t know, but I’ve had enough experiences to fully start to believe that my brain is receiving information consciousness, allowing me to have a physical experience. And that we, if we go beyond the physical aspect to the energetic aspect, then who knows what’s real. So I kind of dodged an answer, but

Matt (00:49:06):
<laugh> that, that, that the best way to answer that question, I reckon <laugh>, the thing that comes to mind for me is just one of Wayne Dyer’s books. He, um, he says, um, he says, you’ll see it when you believe it was the title of his book. And um, and I think that sums it up. What is reality? Cuz we’re, we’re always about, well, I’ll believe it when I see it. And um, and then there’s all sorts of things that we see that we experience as you lean into this more and more <laugh>, anything is possible, anything is, is real. And um, and yeah, just where you focus your attention, then that will become your reality. Yeah, it’s that simple.

Kim (00:49:46):
Yeah. Love it. <laugh> love having these conversations with me too. <laugh> <laugh>, you guys are all about empowering ourselves, allowing ourselves to believe in ourselves, inviting us to trust ourselves and to fully love ourselves through all realms of possibility or our perception of what is real. What does self love mean to both of you?

Matt (00:50:18):
I got the hand, the hand wave <laugh> off to you Anyway. Yeah, so that’s, that’s a, um, I’ve grappled with that for a long time because, um, through, through through my journey, I, I often run into healers or, or coaches and, and, and they say, well, you don’t love yourself enough. You need to love yourself more. And, and I got to a point where that was the most abrasive thing anybody could say to me, <laugh> and I, I wanna give ’em a big F off when they tell me that. Um, the more that I explore it, it’s, it’s an acceptance to me, to me self-love is, is embracing more and more aspects of myself. And I found over the years that, um, based on environment, based on the life that I led, based on judgements mostly of my own, um, there became a, a pushing away and a a the vision within me of different aspects and, and a denying of the totality of who I am. And that as I go through my processes and then pick up those broken parts and embrace them, then that allows me ultimately become more whole. And in essence, that is the process of loving myself, is to find those broken parts and, and, and love and, and hold them, embrace them, accept them.

Guy (00:51:49):
Yeah. Um, no acceptance is, that was where I would’ve led to when, before, before listening to you, Matt. And, and the other word that comes to me is kindness as well. And, and I think it, it really, it, it really boils down to being kind to oneself. And, and I think knowing that we are all doing our best. That with what we got, where we are at right now, and if we can accept decisions, we’ve made choices, we’ve done things we’ve done, cuz that’s all future of past based thinking. And to come back into that moment and start to re respect oneselves and nurture oneself and, and give ourselves permission to feel, to truly feel that, then from that healing will occur. So to me then self love that really starts to come back down to <affirmative> and embracing the whole, yeah, I’m repeating what Matt said because it really is that it’s embracing all aspects of oneselves, accepting it and then moving on from that.

Guy (00:53:08):
And most of the time the things that we don’t accept about ourselves or are tough upon ourselves and normally beliefs that have been imposed by someone else somewhere along the way, conditionally or unconditionally, uh, consciously, unconsciously I should say, at stage of our life. And what I’ve found with myself is that as I’ve leaned into the exploration myself more and more I’ve realized that they’ve served me to this point and then I can let them go. Cuz that belief wasn’t mine in the first place. And, and it’s very freeing and it allows me to become one step closer to my true self. And there’s always something to learn from that. So yeah,

Kim (00:53:51):
So beautiful. I’m not a scientist, I’m not a doctor, but one thing I’ve come to learn is to understand the neurological system, our beautiful nervous system. There is a chemical response that goes on between one synapse to another and there’s this thing called the synaptic gap. And I can honestly say hand on heart, whilst many of us may not know what chemicals have to occur in order for it to cross the synaptic gap, to go into the other one, to create an outcome or a chemical or a response of some sort. Sometimes that’s the missing link in my humble opinion around how we can live a life and flow and full of love. And I have to say to you guys that your live and flow retreat, in my humble opinion, is that synaptic gap. It’s the part of us that we get to encourage an opening of a new way of thinking, of new possibility.

Kim (00:54:50):
Because so many of us loop, we sit in this loop of this constant belief or, or feeling that this is all it is, or this is all I’ve got, or this is what the world’s given to me, or this is what my family has created. And there is that, like you said at the beginning, this outward blame or outward look, that it’s all been happening to me and I love the line that you say it’s actually happening for you, that’s synaptic gap, that new way, that neurological change in perception of reality and realizing that reality is maybe only a perception of it. And what is it anyway, but I’d love for you both to explain then, if I signed up for the live and flow retreat, what is it that you’re offering me? How are you gonna fill that synaptic gap? What are you giving me? Or how will I know when I walk away from there? I got it, I got what you got and I was able to embody it. Tell us about the live and flow retreat.

Guy (00:55:51):
Mm. You’re me to go first, man, I, I, I always think of this, this quote I heard once and it said, remember, we remember who you are, you truly are, and be that. And I honestly feel that that is the, the depth of the work that we are doing. And in a simplistic form, you could say we are, we are helping people remember who they truly are, get them out of their heads, get them out of their environment, getting out of, of who they, whoever they’ve told themselves they are, to go beyond all of that, to connect back to their heart, to connect back to their soul and connect to then something far greater than we can tangibly think with the mind and have a direct experience with that. And to me, it’s then coming back to, it’s like coming home to ourselves. It’s coming back to our truths. But not only that, as we then remember who we are, we connect

Guy (00:57:05):
To that deeper aspect of ourselves. We have those tangible experiences. It changes perceptions, it changes the very lens at which we look upon ourselves, which we look upon our experiences, which we look upon others and which we look upon life. And if we change our perceptions on all those aspects of ourselves, I truly change them. Not, this is not a thinking, it’s like wearing yellow tinted glasses your entire life and then taking them off and all of a sudden you’re like, holy shit, everything’s in technical. I never saw that. And you get to really experience that. Then we’ve given ourselves permission that we come first. We, we, we’ve given ourselves permission to truly live. And from that place, if we’re willing to, to, to put ourselves first in these moments and put the oxygen mask on first in our life and start to nurture us, we’ve become a better parent. We’ve become a better partner. We’ve become a better friend. We’ve become better within the community. We actually are then contributing in a better way. So that’s why they called reconnect. And we start to reconnect. And until you have that experience, it’s very hard to fully understand it. So we invite people, we, we see it all the time. And once people have that new navigational reference point, lives change. And there’s nothing more rewarding for us than to to, to impact a life on a deep, visceral level, not a surface talking level, but in a very visceral way that allows somebody to then empower themselves, have the courage to live more from the heart and lean into their life that way and see it as one great big adventure.

Guy (00:59:02):
The high is the low, like a good book, you know, that you like, that’s how I want to live. That’s how I want to live my life. I certainly don’t want to get to the end and look back and think, oh shit, I wish I’d done that. You know, I’d much rather have a go. Not that we, like anyone likes failing, but, you know, that’s become a very long answer. But that, that’s how I feel about it. And I think in its essence it’s that, and of course you, you, you make friends for life and you realize that we we’re, we’re all so different and beautiful, but we’re all quite the same too <laugh>.

Matt (00:59:40):
Wow. Yeah. That’s, uh, you summed it up quite well. And I think for, for me, uh, it, I, I often, I’m quite observant, observant kind of person, very introspective. And, um, and I, I’ll be in a room of people and I just kind of, kind of watch and observe people observe humanity a lot. And, um, and in that space I have a, I have a deep love for, for people and, and the potential that I see in all of us. And over the last few years especially, um, I, I, I often have this, this thought that we can do much better. We, we can really do much better than what we’re doing on this planet and, and as humans and, and to each other. And, um, and in those retreats it touches me at such a deep level of seeing a group of people come together and do much better for themselves and for each other.

Matt (01:00:45):
And that it seems to send this ripple of hope and possibility into the world and into the hearts of all those that are there, me included. And on a personal level, what I see in those retreats and what I see in the workshops when these people come e courage, they step into the heart of who they are is a world that I wanna leave for my kids. And that’s what it really comes down to for me and the hope that I have for everybody who comes through that space. So that’s what I see and what I promise for anybody who comes through. So feel that space coming home to a greater possibility and potential of themselves and for each other.

Kim (01:01:32):
So poetic, you’re both extraordinary humans. I love you dearly and I feel so proud and privileged to have been a part of that and to have experienced your work. And I can absolutely assure every listener who is curious or maybe even flirting with the idea of having a crash course and coming home to themselves. Then I can honestly say this four day program is probably one of the best I’ve ever been on. And it inspires me to be a better human. It inspires me to be a better teacher of what I’ve learned and what I’ve come to know in this moment of what I can pass on or hopefully create ripple effects beyond what we are even saying. And there is something very special about a group participation and we learn so much being the observer in life, watching others, and then opening our hearts and souls and sharing who we are allows other people the same gift.

Kim (01:02:33):
And if I can give you Petra and the two of you, any feedback, it’s please don’t ever stop. Please keep being you. And I think the way you touch on all the different parts of us, and then my personal love of nature in the form of essential oils and the, the, the essence of the plant through the power of smell. Um, it really is a sensual experience. And so I just wanna thank you and Petra, both of you, wholeheartedly for this work and continue to keep expanding it. And I think one of the greatest things you both said then was that there’s such a gift from your, for yourselves in seeing that in others as well. So do you have a final message for our beautiful self-love podcast listener? And perhaps you can also give us the links on where we can go to enroll in your next program.

Guy (01:03:30):
Well, you know it, this wasn’t what I was expecting to say, but for whatever reason, I was thinking of this when you said, and I think of two beautiful human beings that came to our retreat, uh, Brett and Chad. Now, just to put in perspective, Brett, um, boxing coach, worked in the police force for many, many years. Very physically strong man for strong willed, beautiful human being. And we put him in the same room to share for three nights, thought this work was woo woos batt. He was in a lot of pain and he found himself here. And Chad, his roommate, walked through the door into his room looking like Jesus Christ. He had flared pants on, he had a rainbow colored dye t-shirt on a beard that was longer than his hair. And his hair was past his shoulders. And he thought to himself, I can, can I swear basically, what the fuck am I doing here?

Guy (01:04:32):
And who the fuck is this guy? Basically by the end of the three days, these guys were like two peas in a pod. They are still connected, dear friends. And to me, that is an incredible example of what’s possible in humanity because these two guys fully understood that past their biases, past their beliefs, past their cultural beliefs, past their jobs, past their conditioning, all these things that we are squabbling over in humanity, they in three days, like just connected and understand what it meant to actually connect at a heart and soul level and really embrace all aspects and diversities of what it means to be human and connect to that deeper aspect of ourselves. And I think of these two guys and I think, wow, what if we could bottle that, take that and actually put it out to the world? And instead of judging people, instead of putting people down, instead of knocking people, that then allows us to feel some justification of our action in some shape or form that keeps us in the loop, that keeps us stuck in our shit and our pain unconsciously, that we can start to get beyond all that and start to connect back.

Guy (01:06:02):
And if we don’t actually proactively start to take steps and start taking full responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, emotions, and actions regardless of our situations or circumstances would’ve happened, things don’t change. And we all, as human beings, I believe, have the potential to truly express live from the best of humanity, which is our true default network. Our true default is to come from that place, not of fear, not of competition, but of connection, nurture, love, care, compassion. So that’s what I would say from that.

Matt (01:06:45):
Yeah, no, that’s beautiful mate. I, uh, I second that and um, I know we, we’ve talked a lot about the, the, the retreats and the work we do and um, I think at the essence of it is, um, just, just continue to be kind and ask yourself, am I being, am I being as kind as I can to myself today in each moment? You know, like stick a post-it note in your mirror or on your phone. Say, am I being kind to myself? And, um, and that if you just spend, you know, a few moments each day of clocking in to that kindness, then you’ll have a resource of kindness that then you can offer to others. And then that will ripple into the world. And I think at the basis that’s it. Just can I be kinder to myself today?

Kim (01:07:33):
I love you both so much. Live and flow.com au is where one can go to find out more information about the live and flow retreats. These guys are gonna be around for some time. They’ve got more lives to change, more hearts to open. And I just wanna finish off with you both. I think the word cue came up for me. This is your cue. If you are listening to this. There’s no accident, there’s no mistake, there’s a cue. And I even came up with an acronym for that. It’s about time we connected, we understood and we embraced. So from my heart to yours, your beautiful souls and our beautiful Petra, that’s a part of this whole program, this is your cue to connect, understand, and embrace the heart work that these guys offer. Please go to the website, please follow them, please, if nothing else, be a part of their sphere of influence cuz they are two incredible beings who I absolutely adore. Thank you both for being on the Self-Love podcast. You mean the world to me and it’s an absolute honor and privilege to have you here on the show. Thank you so much, Kim. Yeah, thank you very much. It’s been an honor to be here. Yeah.